You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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