I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
