yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
The air was thick with penises
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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