R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
