Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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