U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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