What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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