I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
