Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
