Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
"it" just moved
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
