i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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