wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
