"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She's the barista slut.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
