I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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