You're so nebulous sometimes
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
