Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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