Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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