Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
North Korea, Best Korea!
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
