How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
