What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
