Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Randomize
