We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
