I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I think I just shit out all my problems.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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