Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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