Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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