Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
