I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
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