I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
