Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I feel like death gave me a hand job
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
