Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
