so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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