I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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