Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
