I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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