Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Randomize
