Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize