Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
