We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
