Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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