My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
