My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
