if only i could text you this smell
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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