Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
