she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize