was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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