Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
