my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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