I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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