Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
