Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
This is the prime rib incident all over again
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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