I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Randomize
